Don't Think Twice, It's All Right

So the writing and reflecting has continued over the past two weeks, with some useful critical feedback.  It doesn't wound as much as I thought it would, but it does make a mark! It lingers, which isn't a bad thing, it's good to remember these things.  For the first week's class, I wrote two things that I shared - a poem based on an experience I had, then a more abstract thing about trying to remember a dream.  I was more worried about the latter, but I went over it a few times, trying to zero in on what I was trying to say.  Then I was on a webinar, doodling, and ended up re-writing it to a point where I was more comfortable with it.

The first poem came easily, and made me laugh. To my surprise when reading it out, it was that one that came in for the most criticism.  Self conscious, trying too hard. Argh! It burns! But I know what they mean.  I was a bit too comfortable with it, I think.  There was a layer of something...too smart? Too knowing? That meant it was funny for me, and the other person involved (he liked it too), but not really relatable by anyone else.

My tutor said 'stop thinking too much'. But I am still thinking. A lot. I'm not sure how to not do that.  So not sure how that will work out.  On the positive side, I had feedback that the good poem used a nice balance of concrete and abstract language and imagery, which is a good thing.  That's something I can work with.

In the last class, I had another two things to share.  Both were quite critically pulled apart this time, but again – in a useful, practical way.  This is how I expected things to be, but I had quite liked the nice positive bubble I was living in at first!!  In the pub afterwards, my tutor says “I hope I wasn’t too hard on you.” It made me think about how in the past, feedback of the kind he have me would have actually upset me – more out of frustration with myself than anything.  At least I know I’m getting better at something!

If you’d like to read something and give me some feedback, I know I can take it!  E-mail your postal address to the usual place.

Everyday is like Sunday

I had myself a cultural Sunday, after waffles for breakfast then waving my weekend visitor (and postal correspondent!) off on a train to the Highlands. I had decided to go to the Inky Fingers ReadEasy – without really knowing what it was. It started at 3 and with a couple of hours to kill, decided to spend some time in the Scottish National Portrait Gallery. What a place. Beautiful portraits and sculptures, so many interesting new people and stories to discover. The Great War exhibition featured lots of principled and characterful people, and the John Byrne exhibition was remarkable – what a talent! Very impressive, and to think I’d not seen his work before. Entry to everything is free. Free! We are so lucky to have access to these things.

As a result of all of the interesting, the 2 hours I had to kill disappeared fast and I ended up running up to the Forest Café on Lothian Road to the ReadEasy. I needn’t have rushed, it’s not that kind of place. The Forest Café has a community centre feel; ramshackle and mismatched tables and chairs, posters everywhere, communal knitting and good strong tea in a mug for only £1. I had submitted a poem beforehand, and the ReadEasy is about having your poem read by others, anonymously, and getting some feedback. It looked for a while like either it wasn’t happening, or there were two of us, but eventually there became a small gathering.

If you’d told me a year ago that I’d be sitting in a hippy café reading and analysing poetry, I’d have pushed you off your chair. But that’s what I did. I read someone else’s poem, which I really liked – lots of strong imagery and a strong sense of nostalgia. Then someone read mine…it was interesting as they’d interpreted different emotions than I’d intended and it was fun to hear how that made a difference. It was also really nice to get feedback. It was largely positive; in fact, too positive – the “this is a fantastic piece” made me blush. Why is it that compliments make feel like a fraud? I have to deprogram myself of that, I think. The main bit of more constructive feedback was pretty much ‘have you ever heard of punctuation?’ I have, of course, but we aren’t good friends. And I notice in poetry, sometimes it’s used a lot and sometimes hardly at all. I’ll have to give that some thought.

Your recommendations have been really useful in my cultural education. Some of my favourites include Philip Larkin’s Aubade (I was told how to pronounce this but instantly forgot!) and WH Auden’s ‘O Tell Me The Truth About Love’. I love how fun that one is. Something I discovered in my investigations was ‘The Memory of Elena’ by Caroline Forché – quite unexpectedly touching, it gave me goosebumps.

Please keep recommendations coming, and if you'd like to read anything & give me your view - let me know!

Exploration

This week I’ve been mostly exploring poetry and looking for inspiration. My tutor says to ‘read something that scares me’ but really, all of it does. My knowledge and experience of poetry is woeful, so it’s quite amusing really that my interest has run off in that direction. Thinking about it though, I do love lyrics, and my favourite musicians tend to be terrible singers but great at writing something ambiguous enough to be interesting as well as meaningful. And by meaningful I don’t mean something deep and worthy necessarily; something true, honest, funny, clever or well written can be just as impressive, engaging, inspiring. In fact, I think my favourite writing of any kind encompasses all of these things.

So, as well as finding some poetry anthologies to pick my way through (I have the excellent Staying Alive anthology trilogy), I’ve also been listening – again, as instructed by my tutor – to Bob Dylan. Have you heard of him? He’s quite good! There’s lots of debate, seemingly, over whether Dylan was a poet or a musician and honestly, I don’t care. I enjoy his storytelling, turns of phrase and the abstraction in his writing. I think that last bit is where I will struggle most when writing, to leave enough for interpretation? Although looks like from interviews Dylan did get annoyed by the “what is this song all about?” question!

So what kind of poetry would you recommend? What will be interesting or a challenge to someone completely new to this? Leave me a comment below!

Also, my offer of sending you some writing is still open, email me if you'd like something. I’ve sent off a bit of poetry so far, it felt good! I am looking forward to seeing what comes back.

My Haiku Habit

Something has happened since I moved to Edinburgh, something totally unexpected. I keep writing and I can’t stop. This is a good thing, for the most part. Writing is something I’ve always wanted to do but when I’ve tried, I’ve always been disappointed with the result. Not just disappointed. Embarrassed, in a ‘crossing out isn’t good enough, now we must burn this’ sort of a way. Now I’m amusing and entertaining myself with my writing and it seems to be happening more and more. Positive encouragement from the creative writing course also helps puff up my feathers a bit and seems to inspire me more. Not that I’m ready to just post something up and leave it here all vulnerable.

I love the Internet, but criticism can feel brutal at the best of times and this electronic connection can depersonalise us both. I think divorced from the look you’ll see in my eyes when you crush me, you’re free to say anything. That stops us both from learning and becoming better people. I want to get better at writing, and I want to share, but I want it to be more personal than that. Not that I’m going to come round to your house and read at you; I can see you already wondering if you can dive behind the sofa and switch the light off in one fell swoop. "No ears here, no no, move on."

So…a thing I’ve decided is that if you want to read something, I’ll post you something. Into a postbox. Like the olden days. E-mail me your address and I’ll write you out a poem, haiku or part of a story I’m trying to write.

And you can let me know what you think.